Just As I Am (again)

Illusions commend themselves to us because they save us pain and allow us to enjoy pleasure instead. We must therefore accept it without complaint when they sometimes collide with a bit of reality against which they are dashed to pieces.

~ Sigmund Freud

When my soul is in the dumps, I rehearse
everything I know of you,
From Jordan depths to Hermon heights,
including Mount Mizar.
Chaos calls to chaos,
to the tune of whitewater rapids.
Your breaking surf, your thundering breakers
crash and crush me.
Then God promises to love me all day,
sing songs all through the night!
My life is God’s prayer.

~ Psalm 42:6-8

Sometimes we go to great lengths to make our appearance all that it can be. We add elements that are not natural, have our hair coiffed, or colored, or extended to create a pleasing image for ourselves and others. We have our pictures taken, smile that we can look that good! We also hearken back to a time when we looked that good, or looked better than we think we do now. I have heard young moms talk about how fat they are and they have no idea what their 40’s will attempt on their now lithe, slim bodies. I remember when I was twenty being told I was fat a weight I would look sickly at now (that is if I could achieve it.)

And then there comes a day when all that illusion, beautiful as it is becomes as an article of clothing that has been worn one season too long. It feels good to take it off, toss it in the laundry, donate it, what-have-you, and face just exactly who you are and what you look like. (Who I am, what I look like.) For me, there is a relaxation that comes with that. I am free from other people’s constraints, and just do what I can so that I am happy as I can be with who and what I present and represent.

That is what I hear in the scripture reference. A cleansing, facing God as I am and being loved with all my “warts,” because God always saw me and what I am in God’s eyes, from the beginning.

Today, let your prayer be “Just as I am”, once more.

Because of Him,
Linda

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1 Comment

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One response to “Just As I Am (again)

  1. cindyluby

    Linda, This one made tears. lc

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